Hasta la vista

Last day of 2009. Yeah baby!!! Thank u God for bringing me this far. I am truly blessed to have all my loved ones still with me. For those we lost, Samson, Okello..... i know u r guys resting with God. You r missed.

2009: It sure went by really fast. I got admitted to my school last year, so the early part of this year was me overly eager to start med school. If only i KNEW!!!! I love life, it's so full of irony. Tensions were home were high, August couldn't come soon enough. Well, August came, and i wished i could turned back the clock on multiple occasions.

I have found adjusting to med school to be tough, but i wouldn't trade it for the world cos ultimately i am living my dream. Soon, i will get to do what i always wanted. I might not be as idealist as i am right now, but i hope and pray i would love my job. Right now, i think i would.

With the end of 2009, comes a desire to do things differently. It has finally sunk in that i am a young lady (y can't i say woman?), and i have decided to leave my borderline tomboyish ways. We might want to try on a few skirts and high heels this new year. Some mascara and lip stick wouldn't hurt (occasionally).

Stuff that happened in 2005 altered the course of my life. Finally, it is no longer a part of my life and is now becoming a thing of the past. I am ready to get myself back. I am in the process of losing all the weight i gained since 2005, my mental health has never been better. There are areas in my life that still need improvement. Need to work on handling stress, esp pple stress better.

Got a new niece. She has made this break enjoyable.

Thank u God for being my rock through this adjustment period. I know the best is yet to come. C u guys in 2010

Title?

Something happened yesterday, very trivial (ok, maybe not so trivial, fucking bastard!) but it made miss having friends. I miss the life i would have had if i has stayed in Nigeria. I miss my friends in Nigeria. How did i go 7 yrs without developing any real friends? All the pple i have been close to in this country have been on the phone.

Thinking of a couple of pple i sent texts messages to lately that didn't bother responding. You guys remember the chic i was supposed to meet up when i came home, sent her a text and she didn't respond. Maybe i sent it to a wrong number, we would never know. I hate being ignored, although i ignore pple (sometimes). Hmmm.... karma, anyone?

Not happy. Going to keep listening to music and maybe fall asleep and wake up tomorrow. Seeing how it's just 10 am, that might be a tall order, but i can hope, can't i?

I don't like u pple

Merry Christmas everyone. Hope u have a fun filled, safe day today. Jesus is the reason for the season (that reminds me, I should pray).

So y don't i like you pple? Who are these pple i don't like, sef? Married pple and Mothers. Yes, i said it. I'm wide awake at 5 am, don't feel like reading a novel, or watching TV, so my mind is wandering. I've been home since Friday and i have pretty much been helping with my 4 month old niece (who is gorgeousness personified, btw). That shit is HARD!!!! The little munchkin controls 3 grown women. She pretty much held me hostage for over 4 hours yesterday. She's tired, but refuses to sleep. You can see her fighting sleep, Ms. Restless, Drama queen in training. She finally sleeps, i hold her for an extra 30 mins, 15 mins more than the advised time to hold her after she sleeps, just to be on the safe side. As soon as i slowly, gently lay her down, her face scrunches up and she starts her tearless cry. Pick her up and she's perfectly calm and peaceful in less than a second.

In case u can't tell, i have no experience with babies. This is all new to me. The last time i was around a baby was in 1999, and that was my neighbor's baby. How come pple don't tell u how hard it is. You just hear about the glamorous, picture perfect side of motherhood. XYZ just had a baby, u see the pictures on Facebook (awwwwwwwwwwww), full stop. No feedback. No, i haven't had any sleep in 3 days or whatever. I have witnessed my sister not have any sleep for close to 24 hours.

Same thing goes to the married folks, or should i say the newly married folks i see on facebook. I am being bombarded left and right by classmates getting married. At least 6 pple i know have gotten married this december, one more is getting married tomorrow. Nobody comes back to give feedback. You see the lovely dress, and all that good stuff and if ur head is not in the right place u don't remember that life continues after the wedding day.

As a single, childless, bachelorette, all i ask for is some feedback. Is that too much to ask on this rainy Christmas day somewhere in Atlanta?

I like White women

What do i say to someone who straight up tells me, if he's given the choice between a black woman and a white woman, he would pick the white woman without thinking twice? He just relocated from naija to Canada and @ 28 he thinks he'll be able to change his accent. When i asked him why he would want to do that, he's response was that it was personal. He said when he was 6, he told his mom he was going to marry a white woman, they were looking at him like he was crazy. When he got older he brought home a white girlfriend, everyone was like wow (i rolled my eyes at that one). According to him, he and his best friend bonded cos they liked the same thing, case in point, white women, now his best friend is married to a white woman with two kids.

There's all sorts of things wrong with his way of thinking and i am not articulate enough to get into an argument with him. I really wished i could have sic'ed Sugabelly on him. It's so clear even though he would never admit it that he thinks white is BETTER. You should have seen his face when he said he brought home a white girlfriend (she's actually mixed: German/Nigerian), it was like he accomplished something major. I don't even know where to start with him. I feel like i would be fighting a losing battle. What am i going to tell him that could possibly change his attitude.

All this started when i said pple who talk with a fake accent are not being real. I wasn't even talking about him, but because part of his agenda when he moved to Canada less than a month ago was to change the way he speaks, he took it really personal. I really don't know how he thinks he's going to change his accent @ the age of 28. I've been here for 7yrs and pple still say, "I hear a slight accent, where's it from?. I met this dude on the plane last friday, first question out his mouth was "Where are u from?'". It's my opinion that, If u come here after a certain age, u r really never able to lose ur accent completely. Best case scenario (for pple trying to lose their accent), u would have an indeterminate accent, like this Neurologist we had as a guest lecturer, She had the cutest accent, but no one could place it. Anyway, i just think this dude is wrong on so many levels and i don't know where to start with him.

Do i start from his ignorance or unconscious self hate? I don't think there's anything wrong with interracial dating, but i think there's something wrong when someone thinks one is better than the other.

Here's a good one, he thinks coming here gives him the certificate to speak with an american/canadian accent, cos when he would speak like that in Naija, pple would complain or tease him and tell him to stop forming. I have just been warned not to use the word forming with him cos he hates that word. Na wa!

Sting Update 101

Been home since Friday. It's been great. My newest niece is so pweety...... she's got our good genes ;). I've been enjoying baby duty. Changed my first diaper today even though i refused to clean the poop first, and i screamed one time when i was checking her diaper to c if she had pooped, stuck my hand in the diaper and touched poop. My sister and mom came running cos they thot something had happened to the baby, I had to apologize.

Final grades come out next week. We all pretty much know how we did. Hmm.... i wish i could give u guys the details of what was going on with me last semester. God is faithful. Right now, i'm one point away from passing one class. I emailed the professor to c if there might be a curve and i was told no. I already knew that cos it is clearly stated in the syllabus. I am literally one point and 0.7% away from passing. I am trusting God that they will give it to me. I'm praying and believing in God cos i know he's faithful. Pls, send a little prayer for me, or if u can't be bothered to pray, think positive thoughts. I need a miracle.

I'm happy though. That's a good thing. I intend to stay that way.

Sad day

So sad............. just heard my brother's friend died in an accident on Saturday on his way home to Atlanta from school. He was a P2 in pharmacy school. I didn't know him that well personally but i knew enough about him cos he's name was always mentioned in the house (in comparison with my brother) and my mom liked him a lot. She actually called and told me about it. So sad. My heart is heavy.

RIP Okello!!

Dear Neighbors,

I don't have a problem with u guys getting it on multiple times a day, at odd times of the day for that matter. All i ask is that you get a sturdy bed. I don't want to know when u have a quickie, or when u take ur time to do whatever. I'm trying to study here, and a vibrating apartment is not very conducive to that, esp when i have to sit through it for 30 mins at a time. Una no dey tire? Na wa o! Must it be everyday? Why r u pple not at work @ 11 in the morning?

Sting.

P.S I did feel slightly bad for like a second after i pounded the ceiling with my broom. I know i cut short ur pleasurable activity. Sowwy, i really really needed to study.

Tiger Woods Vs Santa

Here's my current FB status

What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa stops at three ho's.


I'll be your Mrs. W, Banky!

Tough and Rough

• I forgot myself for a minute there.
• I deal with my own shit myself.
• Never complain to pple
• That's what this blog is for
• Depending on someone to make u feel better = Recipe for disaster
• Really, really, most pple don't give a shit about ur problems.
• They have their own crap to deal with
• Everyone loves someone who is so into them and has time to listen to their issues.
• Most pple don't care to be that for someone else
• At least not constantly
• I really forgot myself for a minute there.
  
• I cry to no one.
  
• My weakness and vulnerability are for my eyes and ears only
• Encourage u to encourage me?
  
• Help me out here......... ???
  
• I'm reaching
  
• You r right, i really don't know the half of what i'm doing.
  
• I've decided to stop being ignorant.
  

Relationship advice

I think i need to go back to my unspoken rule of not talking to friends about my relationship issues. It gets awkward when u don't do as they advised. Mind u this friend never takes my advice also. Still, it's awkward, person don dey old pass something.

So do u guys have rules about stuff like that? What works? I guess it depends on the friend though.

Ah mehn!

• I feel like crap.
• Head's aching,
• Teeth's aching
• Afternoon battles with sleep.
• 10 mins -> 30 mins -> 1 hour naps.
• Diet mountain dew; Monster energy drink; Lipton black tea
  
• List of things to study
  
• Cross stuff out
• Keeps growing; seems never ending
  
• Sleep on the carpet. Bed's too comfy.
• I need comfort, something soft.
• I need a hug.
• Miss my boo boo.
• Finals are next week.
• Wish me luck.
• I'll be home on the 18th
  
• :)

Snow

It started snowing here today. This should be interesting. I guess i can't pretend i'm in Atlanta anymore. I don't know whether to be scared, or hole myself up in this house. I knooowwww. I can be a chicken, but i've never driven in the snow b4. I've lived my life in Nigeria -> Georgia -> now here, this place that is synonymous with cold. I really don't mind cos i know i'll eventually adapt. It's just the fear of the unknown. I have to go get snow appropriate foot wear, wouldn't want to be landing on my ass whenever i venture out of my lair.

For those of u who live where it snows, what are the best kind of shoes to get?

2010

I can't believe i am excited for the new year. I'm already thinking of new year resolutions and stuff like that and i haven't made a new year resolution in yearsssss!!! I just know 2010 is going to be an awesome year for me. I feel it in my old and tired bones :)

I'm excited though. First semester of medical school is about to be over. 3.5 more years to go. Time flies, so i know 2013 is going to be here in a jiffy. Anyway, i'm off to study.

Oh by the way, all those pple who were arguing with me about Tiger Woods, who's laughing now!! He's wife was trying to save him by breaking the window with a golf club, yeah fucking right! She was trying to wallop the shit out of him. Men sef sha! Una tire me. Y do some of u have to cheat, y? Y? Y? how hard is it to be with one person.. Eh? God save me from marrying a cheating man.

Love in Tokyo

I have told many things, paid plenty plenty compliments by guys but no one has ever told me i was a blessing. Awwwwww........ Omo u don make me fall in love ooooooooooo!!!!!