You would think that would be obvious but this chic has chosen not to be cognizant of that fact. It's almost as if i'm not "growing up" and life is not really happening right now because i'm still in school. This place is not my home, i'm just here for school so i refused to change my tags or license even though there's a huge possibility i won't be going back home for residency. I have friends but never took the time to cultivate those friendships because it was all about book, book, book, so it's almost as if i don't have friends and when i say that i don't have friends to said people, they look at me and say what about me. In my mind, "this" is not real, it's all temporary and after this is done, then i will start to live. Well, "this" is not about to be done any time soon, because after med school, comes residency and possibly fellowship and in that time, i have to fit in a family somehow and that dog that my heart refuses to stop desiring, so life is happening now. I'm still trying to get with that program
I will never be a child again. This not boarding school where i get to go home every holiday. I've only been home once this year for 2 days, so i somehow need to embrace this fact that my life is in session and this is my life whether i like it or not and i am a grown woman whether i like it or not. My brain and face has refused to accept the grown woman part. I just think i'm not aging and i'm in limbo, like some sort of mental inertia.
On that note, I need to make a bucket list. First, travel to the North (Nigeria) and finally get that rich alhaji and become his 9th favorite wife. That is not a joke. If i'm going to be shackled it might as well be with the right accoutrements. Wealth looks good on me. Afterall, i am a child of wealth (check my bio ;)
A classmate was saying that she went into medicine for money. I told her she was crazy. There are way easier things with better pay to do for money than medicine. Business for example, i know those white collar people on wall street or whereever make billions and they never had to do rectal exams or disimpact any bowels in their lifetimes.
Will put up the epiphany post soon. The world has been deceiving us and my eyes have been opened. Whomp!
Will put up the epiphany post soon. The world has been deceiving us and my eyes have been opened. Whomp!
Lol Life is really in session no kidding. Lol @ the dog you desire...I kinda desire it too but no space right now. *sigh*
ReplyDeleteAwww I get what you mean, sometimes we get so caught up in achieving our goals that we forget to live. Never been to med school but I can imagine it is stressful as hell or so says my friend at Umich. The mission if you chose to accept it (mission impossible reference) is to try and live and achieve your goals at the same time :)
ReplyDeleteEverytie i read your posts it seems like you're always lamenting about medicine on way or anotherthat i cant help but wonder why you chose to go down this path. i'll be the first to admit that life as a medical student is no joke, but it does get better as the years progress (at the very least 4th year is supposed to be a yearlong vacation!). You do realize that residency is going to be even harder. Medicine itself is a way of life so yo can't pause your life only to hit playwhen you're done with medicine or else your whole life will just pass you by! cultivate friendships, change your tags(its home for 4 years, and wherever you choose to do residency will be home for another 3/4 years), get married, have a baby, get a dog, anything you want to do.
ReplyDeleteI didn't realise I was supposed to be writing my posts according to your specifications, Bumight and you will just have to keep wondering why I chose this path. It's my blog and I will lament if I want to and when I want to. I'm glad 4th year was a year long vacation for you. Don't judge what you don't know and thanks for giving me the advice I already gave myself.
DeleteI don't think her comment was meant to be condescending or chastising. Overall it seemed encouraging and "chin-up" like to me...:)
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